a moth hits the fan, and on the other side of the globe the climate is changing!

So we were eating lunch yesterday at one of our regular places, Modern Cafe, when a moth comes to bug us. It was going totally berserk for a while and then it flew straight through a fan that was blowing next to us. Now, lucky for us the fan was blowing to the opposite direction from us because we had just received our food and this way we didn't have to pick up pieces of the moth - now totally sliced into microscopic pieces - from our foods. Nice.

This, however, reminds us all of the fragile nature of our meager lives. At one moment we are flying around carelessly minding our own business and suddenly are hacked into tiny bits by a mechanical monster that scatters our remains all over the place.

As we stroll around our lives, we should take pleasure in the simple things as every moment could be our last. How sweet is that, aye?

So anyway, I've got some shocking news for ya all!! I stumbled on a well-hidden secret they would rather I not expose. Yet, I feel it's my responsibility towards the human race and all animal kingdom to speak what I know to try my best to save us from the the terror of CLIMATE CHANGE!

We are being told that it is a man-made phenomenon but it's just a conspiracy! The real reason relates to man, but is far more profound than anyone could've expected.

I am of course talking about the connection between the decrease in number of pirates and the increase in global temperature!

Here's what I found:

According to the Pastafarian belief system, pirates are "absolute divine beings" and the original Pastafarians.[4] Their image as "thieves and outcasts" is misinformation spread by Christian theologians in the Middle Ages and Hare Krishnas. Pastafarianism says that they were in fact "peace-loving explorers and spreaders of good will" who distributed candy to small children, and adds that modern pirates are in no way similar to "the fun-loving buccaneers from history." Pastafarians celebrate International Talk Like a Pirate Day on the 19th of September.

The inclusion of pirates in Pastafarianism was part of Henderson's original letter to the Kansas School Board. It illustrated that correlation does not equal causation. Henderson put forth the argument that "global warming, earthquakes, hurricanes, and other natural disasters are a direct effect of the shrinking numbers of pirates since the 1800's." A chart accompanying the letter shows that as the number of pirates decreased, global temperatures increased; the absurdity of this demonstrates how statistically significant correlations do not imply a causal relationship." - Wikipedia

Here's a graph to support the claim:

This all relates to the Pastafarians, who are the followers of the great Flying Spaghetti Monster.

With this amazing proof, do I need to say more?

Adding to everything, I figured out a new kind of chaos theory (or theory of complex systems) and it is: "A moth hits a fan in Hong Kong, and the Climate will Change in Europe, flooding the tulip-farms."